#aaaaa is this really bpd

[ano-kya]

I don't want to wake up in the morning or ever

[cowchickenbeefpork]

Ummm thoughts about Ed’s NPD and BPD? Interested to hear especially after reading your fic

AAAAA THANK YOU FOR READING IT!!!!! with my worldview of Ed having both I feel like his NPD is more prominent and noticeable, it's his first go-to when it comes to his defenses even if he is hiding it (aka season one, I would say he is more overt in his narcissistic vulnerability while covert in his grandiosity in that season, he flip flops around a lot in his presentation on his narcissism in the series buttttt from what I can remember he goes back and forth from hiding his grandiosity but not hiding his vulnerability to hiding his vulnerability but not his grandiosity.) his bpd came first to me, and since most people dont like those traits and he often gets maniuplated for them, he tries to repress it and focus on his narcissism. his npd also keeps him from splitting on himself more often too, both borderlines and narcissists often times see everything as either good or bad, you either are all good or your all bad, which is why treatment is often very hard for both of these groups because no one is all good or all bad. this is why narcissists try to avoid anything that shows a flaw in how they view themselves, they cannot have done a bad thing, since doing a bad thing means they are a bad person, their defenses are more stable and hard to overcome than a borderlines because of this.

i think a easy way to tell is how people with npd and people with bpd split. since npd is more so focused on the self and maintaining the ego, theres three catergories of viewing relationships instead of just two. the first one is someone to perform to, someone to get easy praise from and being able to keep your self essteem in check so you can still feel good about yourselves ( i dont think i need to state here that narcissistss dont actually love themselves, only the image they are trying to contain, this kind of splitting can also be seeing the person theyre performing for as a equal but its not really close, its more superficial ). the two other types are more devaluing, the second kind of narcisstic splitting is seeing someone as someone to inghore, someone who just does not get it and is too stupid too ever get it, the thrid one is the most simliar to borderline splitting since it sees the other as a predator, someone trying to sabotage and hurt them and trying to vitcimize them.

bpd splitting is more so focused on the other, seeing them as someone who is just perfect and you want to know everything about them and always make them happy and how they're just perfect, to them being someone being an abuser manipulator who never cared or loved them in the first place. both of these kinds of splitting are similar in structure but still different, narcissism still mostly focuses on the self while borderline focuses more on the other, narcissism as a defense mechanism is more so focused on the superficial while borderline is more focused on the personal.

when you apply this logic to how ed splits on people, then you kinda start to see this way of performing to keep his ego in check just does not apply to how he treated oswald! his attempts to please him and to help him were exteremly self sacfricial and often put his life on the line! he didnt need to do all of this for oswald to get oswald's praise and admiration, what he does for oswald is more simliar to a borderline wanting to do anything for their favorite person and showcase how much they care for them than a narcissist thinking they met an equal which brings their self essteem up! in the end of how the riddler got his name ed said he based his whole self worth on oswald, and instead of letting himself grieve normally, he tells himself he doesnt need anyone anymore and that hes fine now. the narcissism took over, it didnt even let him fully grieve. he didnt see oswald as just someone to bring his ego up like he did with kristen he didnt reduce oswald's existence to just that, oswald was the only person who ever loved or cared for him and was this amazing figure who ended up being someone who never actually loved him and was only using him in ed's eyes.

i would argue his relationship with lee was more so borderline too, she was the only person he was close to and was the only person who could take his shit during that whose collapse of his ego. he genuinely cared for her and was willing to kill himself out of paranoia he would hurt her! that is not narcissism, he did have narcissistic intentions with their relationship at the start of season four, but it changes into the codependency similarly to what he had with Oswald, only this time being a bit more one sided

That's why ed sticks to his narcissistic defenses more, because, to Ed, this is the only way you can love someone! you can only ever fully love someone if you would basically cut off your whole arm for them just to give them a gift, there are no boundaries! if he only acts selfish in his relationships then he will end up killing them like he did with Kristen too, so as a cope he pretends he doesn't want or desire close relationships during the later seasons, trying to paint himself as a cold logician just so he can have some admiration and praise and love but only from a distance since he knows if he gives too much, something like what happened with Oswald might happen again, and if he takes too much, something like what happened with Kristen might happen again. an Oswald will lead him into being weak and dumb, and a Kristen will lead him into being a monster who only exists to leech off and hurt others. if he just doesn't date then he can never experience either event again and can brush them off like they say nothing about him.

IDK if this whole thread makes any lick of sense, I don't think he was being borderline with Kristen but I do think he realized she was a real person with her own beliefs and opinions only after he killed her, which caused him to panic and repress any guilt or grief he had for the incident and convince himself it was no one's fault and was just destined to happen. Edward is terrible at accepting he did something awful or has emotions and needs, so he represses whatever he feels that conflicts with the image he has of himself and thinks that will be his permanent solution when it always fails him after a few months. he basically ignores and represses his borderline until he finds someone who seems like they are amazing to him which is just. kinda explodes all over the place I AM SO SORRY THAT HIS WHOLE EXPLANATION SUCKS ASS I HOPE I MADE MYSELF CLEAR ASK QUESTIONS IF I WAS UNCLEAR!!!!

[lem0lio]

᯽ intro ᯽

(redoing it cause i had no idea you could write this much in a post sorry im a newbie)

Hi! my name is Elio but Zélie works too, im 18 and im french (KazeKi maxxing)

᯽ Current main fandoms/interests :

Kaze To Ki No Uta (my favorite manga ever I joined for mainly for it <3)

IT

J-Fashion (especially Jirai Kei and Vkei fashion)

Vkei (new to the music also but im getting really into it lately, fav artists rn are Fukuro and Plastic Tree)

Vocaloid (seeing Kikuo in february aaaaa)

I like a lot of other things but idk chat there’s too much

᯽ I mainly draw but im also a cosplayer and i love makeup so i do a lot of looks (idk if tumblr is the kind of app where people post their face but ill just post whatever i want so yeah…)

᯽ Also a lot of my art revolves around the themes of mental illness especially $h, su1c1de and bpd but I will always put a TW before posting a drawing with it

Anyway that’s all I have to say uhhhhhh I just joined after MANY years of lurking cause my heart yearned for a Kaze To Ki No Uta fandom lmao (and also a specific reddie comic and I needed notifications yeah..)

[antisyscourse]

(anon that finished their ask with "aaaaa")

i have looked into median, adaptive and neurogenic systems, etc but it's just really scary and confusing because people don't agree on everything

We've been diagnosed with BPD and so we're scared of using the wrong terms and thinking we're a system but actually our parts arent fleshed out enough to be considered completely separate and something else than emotional parts , etc

We also are pretty sure we're auDHD and basically it feels like trauma+ longterm masking+ BPD has caused our brain to separate things because it was too much for one person to handle.

But also we're scared our trauma isn't "enough" to cause plurality???

atm it's been easier to go with the flow and not question things to hard because otherwise we spiral, but we really want to know if it's okay for us to use terms related to plurality and systemhood even though we know so little about our functioning 🙃

-aaaaaaaa

i'd say it's alright for you to use terms related to plurality and systemhood!! you seem rather confident in the fact that you are at least plural, which means i'd say go for it!! we are not gatekeeping here, every plural is welcome, no matter what!! ^^ p.s all trauma is valid luv, your trauma is 'enough'. :))

[ID: STOP! this is a syscourse free blog! it is a safe space for all systems, so please go away if you intend upon stirring up drama!]

[borderline-culture-is]

not bpd culture probably but aaaaa i love diagnostic criteria because I'm not in any relationships so the first two don't really apply

"unstable self-image" lolyea

impulsive behaviors... well the examples I saw don't apply but yeah I act on impulse and regret it but mostly in conversation

Self-injury is so loose like my fingernails are consistently not doing well & I've had suicidal thoughts but haven't gone further

Does it counta s mood swings if the moods are "depressed", "anxious", "normal (maybe manic in disguise)" or maybe there's more i don't know there's so much

"Problems with anger" I mean i've been told I have deep repressed anger and that seems to track deeply but I've repressed it like so hard most of the time except sometimes I get angry at internet people but that's the internet

Stress-related paranoia... well i mean i'm not good at detecting stress but arguably i am stressed and then paranoia not in the traditional sense but I do have irrational thoughts about what otehr people think of me (they all hate me)

and then this blog is half "oh wow that's relatable" and half "wait i thought BPD was different"

i don't know i just want a label so can go somewhere but also aaa self-diagnosis is scary and i look up to some people with BPD so uh maybe

About favorite persons... I mean like my english teacher makes me irrationally happy but that could be a laughter-based coping mechanism thing/same experience applies to media so might be more like an autistic special interest (but i don't really do sensory things nor do i over-react which kind of rules out both ) & i don't attatch my emotional state to him but also the depressive detaching from people so as to not bother them especially teachers; same with one student who i ddidn't talk to and that's a whole thing aa

-😹 if that's open (sorry for rant i'm just in the middle of processing things and that means using a lot of words)

It can be helpful to yell into the void. I hope you feel lighter. I don't believe that signoff is claimed so I'll add it to the list.

-Mod Ghost

[hearth4days]

🎥 do you have any favorite scenes from your hyperfixation?

🏳‍🌈 do you have any headcanons (lgbt, race, neuro, etc) that are important to you?

(for mha and slash or abuseken 👁️)

Doing a cut because jesus I can't shut up 😭

BNHA has so many scenes aaaaa. Being mostly a villain fan, I've mostly got fights to work with, which is unfortunate when I am not a fighting scenes type of guy

I will say I really loved the Stain fight. A lot of the villains have their scary factor turned down a lot, but Stain was really striking as a villain from the jump. I was watching with my mom at the time, and he wasn't on screen for three seconds before we were both having a very strong "ew" reaction. He's my scrungly now, but I can still appreciate that Hori genuinely made him a threat throughout his whole first arc. It was a good kicking-off point for the rest of the story's themes, and he's such a cool villain

I also really love all of Dabi's backstory scenes. I kind of like that none of them are from his perspective, thematically he's never had any say in his life, so I think it works that we only really hear about his trauma from the people that traumatized him. I think the anime carried it all out very well considering how dirty they usually do all the villains

All of All for One's scenes in the final war arc were incredible. I've liked All for One since 2020/2021ish, so it was nice for Horikoshi to actually acknowledge the history he had that no one but me remembered enough to care about. I reallllly like that he's also a part of the league's theming of just horrific trauma and circumstance while still illustrating that people can be past saving. I think the fandom missed a lot of depth to the story with all the ableist and biased takes that came out of all of that. Also it was just funny to see a toddler murdering people. And I appreciated him being gay for Yoichi in his final moments

Abuse-ken doesn't really have scenes as much as songs :// but I think the best story-wise is Want to be Cremated. Zoy's perspective is a fun one, because while he is supposed to be sympathetic and as much a victim of circumstance, he is also like a pretty shitty person. And he's well aware of this, but he can't seem to help himself until the boiling point of his beloved wife killing herself because of him. I love him so bad. I could go on but I think I've already gone over this song a million times hfhxjsjs

I cannot comprehend how people make quirkless!Spinner anything but POC. 90% of the time he is some average-looking white boy when. That defeats the entire point of his character. I'm white myself, so I leave it alone most of the time, but it is just silly to me. Also he has to be autistic. And he has BPD. Those I can back up with canon. But I also like giving him DID with a fuck ton of fictives because I am the fictive heavy Spinner guy of course

On the DID boat, Dabi is 100% a system and I will stand by that. I think it's an incomplete reading of his character to ignore all of the signs of CSA his character and backstory show, both in his home life and with the whole Ujiko situation, not to mention the inherent trauma of being a Todoroki that I don't think I need to explain. There's obvious signs of different alters even in canon which my friend @/x-neurotoxin-x has gotten into more than I probably could

I hate that the fandom immediately jumped to NPD and ASPD with All for One in an ableist way, because I actually have both of those and I see it in him a lot. Especially the NPD oh my lord. He was born from nothing with nothing, and only his little brother to take care of. The main cause of NPD is emotional and physical neglect, which he experienced severely in both aspects. And then of course, how quirks and his role as a big brother affected his personality as he grew up and slowly came into power as a villain. He sees Yoichi the only way he really can with his background, a belonging. He has to take quirks to survive, he has to be willing to fight people to keep the two of them safe. The only way he got any safety from that was violence and manipulation, and treating himself as powerful. At the same time, we see through his narration of his trauma and his gayass last words to Yoichi, he does not actually think of himself as good. He villainizes himself even a few seconds out of the womb, he calls himself a demon and remains nameless, he claims he is nothing without Yoichi. He has so much NPD but people were assholes about it so now I sound like an asshole if I say it

Stain has to be trans <3 because I say so <3 To be real though, he looks very trans when you take Vigilantes into account. Fym you "fully accepted yourself" and then proceeded to cut your hair 🤨/hj Also I will not get into my headcanonned backstory because this post is long enough, but I also like giving him NPD purely because he has this whole thing of not wanting praise or recognition, and treating himself like a martyr for his goals. I could write a whole essay on him. Also I like giving him religious delusions and a god complex. He is so so silly. Yet another case of That Is Obviously A Black Man, but it's mostly just. Look at his hair y'all. That is not white guy hair

Kurogiri has always been aroace to me and I will not hear otherwise. I have never shipped it with anyone in any way that is not one-sided. Also I have to use it/its for it or I will die

Breaking my personal faves only rule to mention Jin. It is so wonderful that he almost canonically has DID. I love him so much. Genuinely the best DID rep ever

*Record scratch* Different media Hellooooo Ito is canonically a trans guy that's crazyyy. Anyway he is also a system for personal reasons that are not canon at all

Zoy is also a system

So is Frannie. Believe me

[ghoulfr13nd]

(about your ocs) OH HELL YES! your playlists are great and absolutely convey the right vibes if my guesses are any indication! :D i actually have questions about them though! when u make playlists for ur ocs do you put songs in a specific order? like for example, trying to tell a story with songs or dependent on genres or something else? and are those songs purely songs describing their chracters and their vibes or do these playlists also show music taste of these ocs? 👀

and i meant bipolar! i mainly said that because i myself have bpd and i just- yeah i felt these playlists fdgjsdf

you know, i actually didn't consider them being supernatural (pun not intended fsdjk)! for some reason i imagined them in like- crime thriller setting xd but i love that, angel and demon aesthetic is my jam! especially when it turns out it's not just simple "good guys (angels) vs bad guys (demons)" and things are actually more complicated! love the idea of an angel designated to kill in god's name but grappling with her morals it's chef's kiss also I KNEW THEY WERE GAY FOR EACH OTHER YESSSS I LOVE when someone gets ordered to kill the other but it turns into a complicated gay mess! :D it's like- one of my favorite tropes! hell yes! and then you add a troubled kid for them to take care of and that's an instant win for me! is Linsey also supernatural or nah? i love premise of this story!

also omg this art is beautiful! ves looks so cool her style is so in my type fgsdj (also i love the 3rd character they look so cute 🥺) and I would be interested in seeing more of their art! :O (but only if it'd be not too much trouble i wouldn't want to make you dig too much!)

are you kidding i love them all! i think especially Mac because she just seems like the type of character that i naturally gravitate towards lately fgsdjkf (and ah yes, "problematic characters", or as i like to call them: characters that aren't bland and have some actual flavor fsdgafj though i get the fear of showing them, people can get wild with the discorse and accusations 😭)

and aaaaa it's really ok! im doing well thank you! :D hope u doing good too! it was so much fun! ✨

music anon 🎶

LOVE LOVE LOVE THESE QUESTIONS, ANON I WAS SO GIDDY READING THIS ASK THE FIRST TIME THAT I LITERALLY NOT EVEN JOKING, CLAPPED MY HANDS TOGETHER AND SWUNG MY LEGS AROUND. I’ve been SO excited to answer you!

First off, let me say I am so flattered by your interest in my guys???? Like, these are my little dolls that I fling around in my skull sometimes, but barely make it out into the world. It makes me so happy to share them!

ANYWAY. down to business.

when u make playlists for ur ocs do you put songs in a specific order?

I DO NOT, these bad boys are made to be thrown on shuffle! especially Mac’s, because it’s important to me that you don’t know when the somber piano music is gonna hit!

are those songs purely songs describing their chracters and their vibes or do these playlists also show music taste of these ocs?

THEY ARE BOTH!! Mac likes club music, but her sense of time is sort of skewed, so she listens to a blend of pop from several eras. I do think she really likes Billie, she vibes with the edginess of that one album. She’s polished, though, and keeps her doubts buried underneath pretty clothes and lip gloss and several layers of self-importance. The somber songs represent moments where her true feelings rear their heads — they’re abrupt and painful and stop her in her tracks.

Ves, on the otherhand, is possessed by her doubts. Her songs are more of a reflection of this internal struggle to figure out what she wants, how she feels, who she is. My initial concept for her includes more of a club-vibe for what she listens to, too, but I really think she enjoys rock. However isn’t the type to sit around feeling sorry for herself. She prefers to suppress that, by finding trouble to get into. So songs like Two Beers In and the songs by girl in red are there to describe her.

Linsey is mostlyyyy narrative-driven stuff. I don’t know she cares much for music. But she’s got a thick accent and has spent more time with her granny than she has her parents, so her songs are more focused on that aspect of her, as well as her struggles as she learns how to be a kid. Linsey isn’t supernatural, but you’ve got me rethinking that a bit. I might change that.

Finn is the one without a playlist. He’s just trying to keep it together. His dad was a fisherman and he followed the family business, and pretty much only owns clothes that are good for being outdoors. Finn is also human, and his humanity is important to me, so he’ll probably stay that way. I don’t have much lore for him other than that though. 😔

Thank you for listening!! I don’t share them very often so it means a lot to me. I’ve dug up some old art (drawing isn’t my strong suit so please take them with a grain of salt). I’ll attach it in a reblog.

But what about you?? What are your OCs like? I would love to hear about yours!!

[heartshapedblossoms]

I've lost my sense of personality again. I have no idea who I am or what I want.

[mollydollyjournals]

Aaaaa I found a dbt app! I've been wanting dbt forever and it's so irritating trying to find it, let alone during a pandemic. An app isnt exactly going to be the same as proper therapy but it's better than nothing. It costs, but not much compared to therapy, and it has a free trial of a few days so I'll have a look around and see if I think it might be useful. Besides if it helps, I'll save money by not buying alcohol and other impulsive stuff.

Its things like emotional regulation that I struggle with. The spiral and all. I still think I really need more support but I know I also need to figure this stuff out. It's why it pisses me off when I've been to alcohol/drug places and almost all of what they say is about physically cutting down and getting through withdrawal. That's definitely a huge part of it, but like...I've done that. A few times. In the end I know I can do that if I have to. It's very difficult, but doable. But theres a reason I keep slipping again and that's the underlying mental shit. That's what I need to fix. If I can fix that, getting through physical withdrawal will be easier anyway because I wont feel like it's pointless to try it again.

Besides it's not just alcohol for me. That's just my current thing. I'm just always looking for external stimulation and regulation in one way or another. My brain chemistry is fucked on a very permanent basis and trying to just not be that doesnt help, it makes it worse. I've had so much cbt they say it's pointless because I already know it all and can figure it out myself. But I've never had dbt, which is more about working with/around the mental stuff, and is famously good for more difficult things like BPD.

Idk. I vent a lot here. It's usually all the bad stuff I cant put anywhere else. It probably looks like I never try to be positive or anything. I'm just scared to, and I have a compulsive need to be honest, and I just have to put it all somewhere. So everything that goes here usually is all the stuff that I need to work on. Like my big spiral yesterday.

Idk I just want something to work. I'm on so much prozac, I've had so much cbt, I should be medicated for ADHD but I cant try that until I sort my other stuff out. I didnt get on with ritalin and I dont want any more incidents. Plus that's only one issue. I just feel like such a tangled mess I dont even know where to start. Even just now I'm thinking about it and getting anxious because it's so daunting theres just so much about me that needs to change. I wish I really was just a ball of old cables. I find it kind of relaxing untangling those bit by bit. I have to remember it's the same concept. It's just hard.

[kudae]

,

[doctorguilty]

You know that bpd feeling... after an old fp leaves your life, you may not miss them or care about them anymore but you're brain is still trained in a way.. when something good happens, when you have something to vent about, when you want to show off something nice, when you have an idea to share...the first person who comes to mind to message is that old fp? And you have to experience the moment again and again of being disappointed, having to go, "oh right.. nevermind" and you dont know who to tell... youre scared to tell anyone becuase they may seem trivial to others but they're important to you, and only your fp would understand. You know the feeling? I'd been going through it for just under a year I reckon haha...

I noticed today though... I haven't been thinking about my old fps much when I have something I want to share..... I'm starting to think about max first....

Ahh I'm still very anxious though getting used to a new fp like /o\ opening my heart is scary (but me and them talk about this stuff it's not like they dont know about how I feel!) but that's a big step for me....... I really want to show them and tell them things first ;//×//; I feel real shaky about it but also giddy but also nervous!! I feel like I'm happy to be moving on but I'm trust falling in slow motion aaaaa /o\ new fp ahhh......

[fluffy-thoughts]

Rambling, feel free to skip

GOD so much has happened in the past few weeks it's insane and like I just wanna ramble all this good stuff

Well first off, I started playing Among Us, got OBSESSED with the game, and the fandom, and I ended up making a server. It now has MORE THAN FIFTY PEOPLE in it!!! It's an 18+ only LGBT only server so we're all dumb and accepting and it's just aaaaa it's such a good group of people!!!!

And with this nice group, I've also made so many fucking nice friends like.. People who have been helping me through little breakdowns or just having flashbacks and such about ex friends and like, it's so nice. They're all so fucking nice and they deserve the WORLD and I'm so glad I made this chat, AND reached out to a longish time mutual and now they're in the chat and we're friends too TwT god

Everything is just going so well, with my job and my friends and life and it's just so peaceful and nice to not have problems going on

OH AND ////// I,,, have a new crush, well not THAT new cause I had a crush on them before, but every time I talked about them before I was guilted about how I'm already dating people sldkfjsd but luckily that's not the case anymore, and this person has been there for me through so MUCH bullshit and I'm like majorly loving them (I think platonically???? But who fuckin' knows with my emotions and brain) but it's officially been over a year since we've been like SERIOUS talking so we're well past the like, normal excitement stage for me, so I'm settling it on a crush, plato or romo who knows yet but still

But anyways they've been there through so much and they play Among us and /)//////(\ they're a total dom/top and such and of COURSE they love being imp, and we keep discussing ideas of like "What if the imp did this to the crewmate?" and such like obviously talking about me and them and aaaaaa,,,,,

My little gay heart can barely stand it they're so sweet and THEY DONT MIND MY EMOTIONS they don't mind that I go through like a rollercoaster of emotions and they're very reassuring cause THEY ALSO HAVE BPD and they UNDERSTAND and they like to send me nice songs and they don't mind me like totally being obsessive over them, plus their partner is also totally cool with it and aaaaaa ///////

All this to say I'M DOING REALLY GOOD IN LIFE I have friends, I can trust people again, I've been drawing again (nothing I wanna post though,,,,), I've been watching things I've put off watching for so long, going out places, like... Everything is just really good right now and I'm really happy.. and I wanna remember this moment and keep it going!

Sorry for the spam, thank you if you read this <3 !!!!!

[phloater]

guess who got a haircut [they/them]

[rnainframe]

01: lego movie! pacrim! 02: special spaceship! dangerstrong! powervest (ours not the other one)! newmann! 03: benny! emmet! rex! gcbc! newt!

already did pacrim! 

lego movie!

Favorite character: GCBC, Emmet, Benny, Rex

Least Favorite character: Business, for a lot of reasons that’s like 50% fanon

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon): Coppernauts, Special Spaceship, Specialcop, Spacevest, etc

Character I find most attractive: haha man why would i find a lego attrex

Character I would marry: Emmet seems like he’d be really sweet to love,

Character I would be best friends with: all of them. except business

a random thought: imagine how awesome (pun) it is to know your favorite song is by your best friend,

An unpopular opinion: like half the cast? all trans? not a single one of them are nt also

My Canon OTP: i’m not too into emmetstyle but it’s very cute!!!

My Non-canon OTP: any combination of benny, emmet, and gcbc

Most Badass Character: listen. listen. emmet is badass

Most Epic Villain: Rex...............

Pairing I am not a fan of: remmex aka vestcest, also apparently copcest is a thing. if it needs -cest in the name it’s not gonna be good

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): Rex, mainly cause... uh. killing off a character that’s motivated by trauma instead of working on helping that character recover? really guys?

Favourite Friendship: The entire squad by the end of the first movie, the second one kinda janks it up a bit

Character I most identify with: honestly? emmet

Character I wish I could be: bebby...

special spaceship!

When I started shipping them: i wasn’t really into any lego ships besides coppernauts until recently

My thoughts: benny is so excited and supportive about emmet’s stuff and emmet is supportive of benny and aaAAA

What makes me happy about them: they’re so dang cute!!! and there’s so much stuff for them just in canon that could be used to nudge at the ship

What makes me sad about them: they drift apart in the second...

Things done in fanfic that annoys me: i don’t go out of my way to read fics

Things I look for in fanfic: the ship existing,

My wishlist: uuuhhhhhh??? dunno

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: emmet w/ lucy, benny w/ lenny cause THAT’S CANON BABEY

My happily ever after for them: happy boys chillin together n supportin each other..

dangerstrong! (rex / cosmo)

When I started shipping them: as soon as you and i were like .... HEY WAIT A MINUTE

My thoughts: as soon as they get over their toxic masculinity it’s over for you fucks

What makes me happy about them: traumatized boys just tryin to live together

What makes me sad about them: rex is too absorbed in his machismo shit and cosmo is too focused on trying to swallow all his ‘weak’ emotions..

Things done in fanfic that annoys me: nothing cause It Doesn’t Exist

Things I look for in fanfic: v’s stuff

My wishlist: uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: they don’t really have anyone else besides powers n leo so i guess them!

My happily ever after for them: recover togetherrrr

powervest! (rex / undarcop, not rex / clutch, didn’t know about that ship)

When I started shipping them: very recently

My thoughts: hateships are fun sometimes

What makes me happy about them: bastard boys

What makes me sad about them: bASTARD BOYS

Things done in fanfic that annoys me: nothin

Things I look for in fanfic: v’s stuuuuuff

My wishlist: uuuuuuuuu???

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: cosmo. cause. you fool. all THREE of them get together

My happily ever after for them: THREEEEE

newmann!

When I started shipping them: januaryish

My thoughts: they’re so good. so fucking good

What makes me happy about them: the fact that there’s a good chance they’re canon

What makes me sad about them: so many possibilities

Things done in fanfic that annoys me: dunno? i guess when they’re portrayed doing straight people type bickering where there’s like. no love just fighting

Things I look for in fanfic: them bein tender.....

My wishlist: dunno!

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: dunno!

My happily ever after for them: they get to settle down somewhere, live together, herm takes up keeping plants and newt gets a lizard or something, they spend every morning waking up to coffee and sweet nothings and hhghGHGHG

benny!

How I feel about this character: he’s so good and i love how his fixation on spaceships isn’t JUST comedy relief

Any/all the people I ship romantically with this character: Emmet, GCBC, Rex, Lenny

My favorite non-romantic relationship for this character: him and his space squad! family n friends

My unpopular opinion about this character: trans gay boy w/ adhd...

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: getting more development into his fightier side besides one scene of him swinging around spiky stuff before getting shot with a sticker

Favorite friendship for this character: him and emmet are Good Pals

My crossover ship: uuhhhh man i dunno? not a romantic ship but i bet he’d be BEST FRIENDS with the space core

emmet!

How I feel about this character: he’s honestly really important for non-nt kids imo, he’s heavily coded as autistic and showing that you can be important and talented even if you rely heavily on routine or have a condition that’s heavily stigmatized as a huge damper on your life is REALLY GOOD

Any/all the people I ship romantically with this character: Benny, GCBC, Lucy

My favorite non-romantic relationship for this character: his friendship with the squad!!!

My unpopular opinion about this character: trans bi boy that’s autistic!!!

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: he could have been handled better by tlm2

Favorite friendship for this character: all!!!!! of them!!!!

My crossover ship: no idea!

rex!

How I feel about this character: he could have been handled SO much better but he’s so good as is

Any/all the people I ship romantically with this character: Benny, Cosmo (undar Benny), GCBC, Powers (undar GCBC), Lucy

My favorite non-romantic relationship for this character: his sort of weird older brother thing w/ emmet

My unpopular opinion about this character: OKAY SO FIRST OF ALL, GUYS? EMMET IS HIM. THAT’S HIM BUT YOUNGER. SECOND OF ALL, HE’S.... BASICALLY ABUSIVE TOWARDS HIS PAST SELF ANYWAYS! IT’S OVERALL NOT GOOD!

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: redemption arc.... at least let him recover

Favorite friendship for this character: there’s like no options

My crossover ship: rex x someone that v will kill me for naming

gcbc!

How I feel about this character: He’s a good boys! He’s a great boys!

Any/all the people I ship romantically with this character: Emmet, Rex, Benny

My favorite non-romantic relationship for this character: him sort of awkwardly trying to make up for what he did under business’s orders w/ the squad

My unpopular opinion about this character: that’s very much DID and also bad cop and good cop? brothers. don’t ship them.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: more good cop stuff before he got erased? also exploring how he’d be post the apocalypse timeskip

Favorite friendship for this character: the boys w/ each other. explore how they are towards each other as a systemmmm

My crossover ship: man. i dunno

newt!

How I feel about this character: he’s so good. he’s s ofuckign good

Any/all the people I ship romantically with this character: hermannnnn

My favorite non-romantic relationship for this character: he’s married to his work

My unpopular opinion about this character: trans gay boyyyyy. adhd / bpd

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: ANYTHING BUT HOW UPRISING DID IT

Favorite friendship for this character: he’s friends w/ all the other main shatterdome people come On

My crossover ship: i’m not telling

[toadallybpd]

Wow I’ve never been tagged in one of these ayy (:

tagged by: @drinkingtheyellowpaint

Rules: answer 21 questions and tag 21 people you want to know better

Nickname: don’t have one

zodiac sign: Taurus (:

height: 5’8” which is way taller than most people expect but I promise you I am still baby

hogwarts house: I used to be into Harry Potter so when I was I did the test thing and got ravenclaw

last thing i googled: APA accredited clinical psychology programs in Wisconsin (there’s only 4 and they’re all extremely competitive 🙃)

favorite musicians: The Underachievers and A$AP Rocky

song stuck in head: Playboi Carti - No Lie (help me pls)

following: 388 (fr? I thought it was way more than that)

followers: 5,966

do i get asks: not a huge amount. I feel bad because I’m really busy a lot and by the time I have free time to do asks I’m often either too mentally drained from working in a very very busy and mentally demanding customer service environment for 30-40 hours a week or I’m in a bad mental place due to bpd so I feel like a fraud/hypocrite while trying to give advice. I promise I’m not annoyed with getting asks and I do want to help. If you do send an ask, I’m not ignoring you. I’m just waiting until I’m mentally healthy enough to give you a thorough ask with other resources included (when applicable).

amount of sleep: it varies a lot but typically 9-11 hours. Next month I’m going to fix my sleep schedule to prepare for college. I usually wake up at 11am-1pm but during school I’ll have to wake up at 9am so I’ll need to fix my sleep schedule.

wearing: a grey croptop tank top thing with the back open but like laced kind of??? Idk how to explain. Also black cloudfoam adidas shoes and these black gym shorts (kinda) I bought from Walmart for less than $3 lol I couldn’t resist the deal

dream job: clinical psychologist but oh boi the graduate programs for it are very daunting. Luckily it’ll be 2-3 years before I gotta start to worry about that (I’m starting my first year of college next month aaaaa)

instruments: I tried to learn how to play the flute when I was in like 4th-5th grade but I was and still am extremely inconsistent in every single aspect of life so I never ever practiced. I had to play at a concert and I didn’t know a single song so I just pretended to play the notes while not actually playing but I’m sure it was very obvious bc a lot of parents were staring at me ((:

languages: just English. I gotta give people who are fluent in 2+ languages props. It is so difficult and I struggled in every single Spanish class I’ve ever had. I was so lost while trying to learn how to conjugate verbs and shit. The best grade I’ve ever gotten in a high school Spanish class was a D-. I’m going the bachelor of science route mainly to avoid having to learn a foreign language. I’m much much better at learning math. It has logical rules. Language has rules and then there’s a ton of words that are just like no fuck you I’m not going to follow any of your rules

favorite songs: I can’t choose individual songs for most musicians I listen to so I’m just going to mostly list more musicians... Unaloon, Schoolboy Q, ghostemane, lil skies, Billie Eilish, Planet Shrooms by Woodie Smalls, LOML by cvmel, PVRIS, old BMTH, old OM&M

random fact: My actual name is Hailey lol most of my followers don’t know that bc I rarely mention it (sorry if you already knew that lol I can’t think of anything else)

tagging (don’t feel bad if u don’t wanna!) : I am scare

[bpdanakins]

kingofattolia replied to your post “i think i could genuinely make an entire essay on bpd!anakin and bpd...”

DO ITTTT

sanbantaikarin replied to your post “i think i could genuinely make an entire essay on bpd!anakin and bpd...”

Do it do it do it

y’all i really appreciate this support djkhskjhd i’m so tempted but also worried i’ll get started and then end up too distracted to finish so keep that in mind but aaaaa